Dr LeCrone
05-31-2006, 12:11 PM
Do you know anyone who fits this description?
They never seem to be happy unless they are unhappy.
They believe that most of the good things that happen in life are due to good luck, and they feel that they are unlucky.
If they feel liked at all, they feel that it is due to what they have or what they can do for someone.
If they are paid a compliment, they respond by refuting the statement or giving some reason why it is unjustified.
The few friends they have easily become worn down with their pessimistic outlook.
They seem to find it easy to view things negatively and have great difficulty in believing in possible positive outcomes.
Life for them is one tragedy after another and they often seem troubled.
If you know someone like that and you comment to them that it is a beautiful day, they might respond by saying, "Yes, but the long range forecast is for a very dry summer." If you compliment a meal
they have prepared they may reply, "Yes, but we can't afford to eat like this very often--food costs too much these days." Even praise for their children brings forth devious remarks like, "Well, they only act nice when they are around other people. At home they are horrible."
These unhappy individuals seem to thrive on the negative and let their pessimistic outlook completely pervade their thinking. Happiness is rare for them, and when it does occur it is short lived and often perverse.
It is no surprise therefore that these individuals frequently suffer from depression, social isolation and difficulty in establishing and maintaining meaningful relationships.
They are constant worriers, filled with anxiety. They have a strong need to be subservient and apologetic, but they harbor a great deal of hostility which is often expressed in inappropriate and sometimes explosive ways. Guilt often plays a great role in their psychological makeup.
Their sour, dour and unpleasant disposition often correlates with a poor self-concept. They are generally lacking in self-confidence and their outlook leads to a frequent self-fulfilling prophecy.
They believe that things don't turn out right; therefore, things don't. These individuals often go through life missing so many wonderful experiences, frequently knowing that there is another world out there, but feeling afraid and unable to step into a different kind of life.
Books and movies frequently portray these characters as villainous and unfit, often characterizing them is Ebenezer Scrooge. Many of them develop their outlook as a result of a very unhappy childhood. For them physical and psychological abuse often took the form of neglect, harsh criticism and a lack of unconditional love.
Learning to change long standing ways of looking at life and accompanying feelings is never easy. It is often painful. Normally when we examine ourselves in an objective way we are going to change things that we don't like and that are difficult to accept. The need to suffer is not an insurmountable problem. But it must be recognized as a problem before any help can be given.
Copyright c 1992 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D
They never seem to be happy unless they are unhappy.
They believe that most of the good things that happen in life are due to good luck, and they feel that they are unlucky.
If they feel liked at all, they feel that it is due to what they have or what they can do for someone.
If they are paid a compliment, they respond by refuting the statement or giving some reason why it is unjustified.
The few friends they have easily become worn down with their pessimistic outlook.
They seem to find it easy to view things negatively and have great difficulty in believing in possible positive outcomes.
Life for them is one tragedy after another and they often seem troubled.
If you know someone like that and you comment to them that it is a beautiful day, they might respond by saying, "Yes, but the long range forecast is for a very dry summer." If you compliment a meal
they have prepared they may reply, "Yes, but we can't afford to eat like this very often--food costs too much these days." Even praise for their children brings forth devious remarks like, "Well, they only act nice when they are around other people. At home they are horrible."
These unhappy individuals seem to thrive on the negative and let their pessimistic outlook completely pervade their thinking. Happiness is rare for them, and when it does occur it is short lived and often perverse.
It is no surprise therefore that these individuals frequently suffer from depression, social isolation and difficulty in establishing and maintaining meaningful relationships.
They are constant worriers, filled with anxiety. They have a strong need to be subservient and apologetic, but they harbor a great deal of hostility which is often expressed in inappropriate and sometimes explosive ways. Guilt often plays a great role in their psychological makeup.
Their sour, dour and unpleasant disposition often correlates with a poor self-concept. They are generally lacking in self-confidence and their outlook leads to a frequent self-fulfilling prophecy.
They believe that things don't turn out right; therefore, things don't. These individuals often go through life missing so many wonderful experiences, frequently knowing that there is another world out there, but feeling afraid and unable to step into a different kind of life.
Books and movies frequently portray these characters as villainous and unfit, often characterizing them is Ebenezer Scrooge. Many of them develop their outlook as a result of a very unhappy childhood. For them physical and psychological abuse often took the form of neglect, harsh criticism and a lack of unconditional love.
Learning to change long standing ways of looking at life and accompanying feelings is never easy. It is often painful. Normally when we examine ourselves in an objective way we are going to change things that we don't like and that are difficult to accept. The need to suffer is not an insurmountable problem. But it must be recognized as a problem before any help can be given.
Copyright c 1992 Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D