Dr LeCrone
05-21-2006, 10:24 PM
Ideas about parenting have changed in the past several decades. Child psychologists have encouraged both parents to actively participate in the child’s growth and development by modeling their values and beliefs and by demonstrating their affection and concern.
Dr. Berry Brazelton, a noted Harvard physician, has pushed for a longer bonding time for infants and mothers. Fathers have taken “maternity leave” to assist in the household. In doing so, many father have learned the complexity of household management.
Many young adults begin marriage with ideas about sharing responsibilities, and marriage counselors encourage these couples to discuss their needs and concerns about meal planning, chores such as laundry, cleaning, marketing and socializing with friends, relatives and family.
Another area of great concern is the amount of time the each spouse will devote to job or career. Individuals often get caught up in the pattern of long hours on the job. While this produces material successes and positive regard by colleagues and peers, the end result can be that the worker devotes the largest portion of life to a career. And children of the career-bound parent could grow up with less attention. A quick depression of the TV remote-control can switch you from one sitcom to another where the theme may be one of attempted reconciliation with a parent who simply wasn’t available during the early year of life.
When beginning a new job, many men and women find it necessary to spend long hours at work. This can become a habit and lead to workaholism.
When both husband and wife have satisfying careers, they should decide how to manage their time so the family unit is the No. 1 priority. To accomplish this, they can:
• Set aside regular, frequent times for the family to sit down and spend time talking about how each person’s needs are being met – or not met. Use this information to modify each family member’s responsibility.
• If children are in the home, try to always have one parent present when the children come in from school. After-school time is the part of the day when the child wants to share events of the day, to tell of successes or failures. Parents can be there to take care of the cuts and scratches as well as to provide the strokes and pats on the back. By helping with or supervising homework, the parent can teach study skills and habits. Having a relaxed setting after school and in the evenings is important for healthy family development. Arranging for a shorter workday or flexible scheduling of work hours can make the family time possible.
• Establish definite responsibilities and duties for each member. Sharing these duties and rotating them can keep any assignment from becoming a burden.
• Set aside definite periods of time when the family can be together as a unit. Eating meals together, packing a picnic supper or sharing a time of recreation can result in renewed cohesiveness.
• Periodically examine the health of the family unit to see if pressures are building. Careers and work duties can be heavier at different times of the year. Preparing for periods of stress and demand can eliminate misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
• Working families can be happy families, but the psychological health of the family should be monitored closely for signs of stress.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1989
Dr. Berry Brazelton, a noted Harvard physician, has pushed for a longer bonding time for infants and mothers. Fathers have taken “maternity leave” to assist in the household. In doing so, many father have learned the complexity of household management.
Many young adults begin marriage with ideas about sharing responsibilities, and marriage counselors encourage these couples to discuss their needs and concerns about meal planning, chores such as laundry, cleaning, marketing and socializing with friends, relatives and family.
Another area of great concern is the amount of time the each spouse will devote to job or career. Individuals often get caught up in the pattern of long hours on the job. While this produces material successes and positive regard by colleagues and peers, the end result can be that the worker devotes the largest portion of life to a career. And children of the career-bound parent could grow up with less attention. A quick depression of the TV remote-control can switch you from one sitcom to another where the theme may be one of attempted reconciliation with a parent who simply wasn’t available during the early year of life.
When beginning a new job, many men and women find it necessary to spend long hours at work. This can become a habit and lead to workaholism.
When both husband and wife have satisfying careers, they should decide how to manage their time so the family unit is the No. 1 priority. To accomplish this, they can:
• Set aside regular, frequent times for the family to sit down and spend time talking about how each person’s needs are being met – or not met. Use this information to modify each family member’s responsibility.
• If children are in the home, try to always have one parent present when the children come in from school. After-school time is the part of the day when the child wants to share events of the day, to tell of successes or failures. Parents can be there to take care of the cuts and scratches as well as to provide the strokes and pats on the back. By helping with or supervising homework, the parent can teach study skills and habits. Having a relaxed setting after school and in the evenings is important for healthy family development. Arranging for a shorter workday or flexible scheduling of work hours can make the family time possible.
• Establish definite responsibilities and duties for each member. Sharing these duties and rotating them can keep any assignment from becoming a burden.
• Set aside definite periods of time when the family can be together as a unit. Eating meals together, packing a picnic supper or sharing a time of recreation can result in renewed cohesiveness.
• Periodically examine the health of the family unit to see if pressures are building. Careers and work duties can be heavier at different times of the year. Preparing for periods of stress and demand can eliminate misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
• Working families can be happy families, but the psychological health of the family should be monitored closely for signs of stress.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1989