Dr LeCrone
03-30-2006, 11:44 AM
Sue and John were young and energetic, active in their community and successful in their careers. By their friends’ standards, they seemed to have it all: a nice home, two beautiful cars, designer clothes and frequent vacations.
Sue felt it was important to “dress to impress,” as she called it. She gave lavish parties and often bought useless items. She also frequently hid the bills from John. He knew they were spending much more than they could afford, but clubs and entertainment were part of his new status as an executive. He felt sure his salary would soon cover the mounting debts.
If you were to ask who was the best catch in town among all the eligible bachelors, many young women would think of Tom with his sports car, good-looking wardrobe and townhouse in the new residential section. But Tom’s creditors and bankers would be cautious about agreeing with you. Tom was always overdrawn at the bank; he couldn’t seem to pay his bills on time. His spending habits were erratic. Sometimes he would spend an unlimited amount, then withhold his spending for a time.
Sue admitted she couldn’t help herself. Any time she felt down in the dumps, she embarked on a shopping spree because nothing cheered her up like “something new.”
Tom had worked his way through college and should have acquired good budgetary habits, but he still felt like he wasn’t part of the country club set. He felt he had to prove himself by showing he had the money to be there.
Victims of compulsive spending, Sue and Tom won’t stop spending even though they see a self-destructive pattern unless they seek help. Studies of people like Sue and Tom reveal they formed these behavior patterns to fill a void. They often buy to hide other problems, such as a poor relationship, lack of friends or poor family communication. Careless spending only makes the original problems worse. Compulsive shoppers are usually victims of the hidden persuaders of the advertising media and easy credit which seem to emphasize that everyone “should” have whatever they want. They may be the victim of:
• Depression.
• Stress.
• Low self-esteem.
To change compulsive buying habits, financial experts and budget counselors recommend several strategies:
• Learn to delay the need for immediate gratification. The spender should put time and distance between the impulse to spend and moment of the purchase. The reward will be greater gratification when the debt is relieved. Financial experts advise spenders like John, who already may have an executive title, to wait until he has the cash reserve to cushion his spending.
• Seek pleasure in people, rather than in things. Spenders like Sue and Tom are advised to indulge in hobbies, participate in community activities and volunteer for recreational activities with youths. By devaluing possessions and valuing people, they can raise their self-esteem.
If you think you are a compulsive spender, check yourself.
• Do you feel “high” or exhilarated after a spending spree?
• Do you shop to cheer yourself up?
• Do you buy things you don’t need just because they are on sale?
• Do you have unused items in your closet with price tags still attached?
• Do you hide bills from your spouse or sneak items into the house?
• Are you unable to say how much you are in debt?
If your answer to several of these questions is yes, you may want to look more closely at your attitude toward money and spending. Compulsive spending can be one of life’s greatest causes of stress.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1988
Sue felt it was important to “dress to impress,” as she called it. She gave lavish parties and often bought useless items. She also frequently hid the bills from John. He knew they were spending much more than they could afford, but clubs and entertainment were part of his new status as an executive. He felt sure his salary would soon cover the mounting debts.
If you were to ask who was the best catch in town among all the eligible bachelors, many young women would think of Tom with his sports car, good-looking wardrobe and townhouse in the new residential section. But Tom’s creditors and bankers would be cautious about agreeing with you. Tom was always overdrawn at the bank; he couldn’t seem to pay his bills on time. His spending habits were erratic. Sometimes he would spend an unlimited amount, then withhold his spending for a time.
Sue admitted she couldn’t help herself. Any time she felt down in the dumps, she embarked on a shopping spree because nothing cheered her up like “something new.”
Tom had worked his way through college and should have acquired good budgetary habits, but he still felt like he wasn’t part of the country club set. He felt he had to prove himself by showing he had the money to be there.
Victims of compulsive spending, Sue and Tom won’t stop spending even though they see a self-destructive pattern unless they seek help. Studies of people like Sue and Tom reveal they formed these behavior patterns to fill a void. They often buy to hide other problems, such as a poor relationship, lack of friends or poor family communication. Careless spending only makes the original problems worse. Compulsive shoppers are usually victims of the hidden persuaders of the advertising media and easy credit which seem to emphasize that everyone “should” have whatever they want. They may be the victim of:
• Depression.
• Stress.
• Low self-esteem.
To change compulsive buying habits, financial experts and budget counselors recommend several strategies:
• Learn to delay the need for immediate gratification. The spender should put time and distance between the impulse to spend and moment of the purchase. The reward will be greater gratification when the debt is relieved. Financial experts advise spenders like John, who already may have an executive title, to wait until he has the cash reserve to cushion his spending.
• Seek pleasure in people, rather than in things. Spenders like Sue and Tom are advised to indulge in hobbies, participate in community activities and volunteer for recreational activities with youths. By devaluing possessions and valuing people, they can raise their self-esteem.
If you think you are a compulsive spender, check yourself.
• Do you feel “high” or exhilarated after a spending spree?
• Do you shop to cheer yourself up?
• Do you buy things you don’t need just because they are on sale?
• Do you have unused items in your closet with price tags still attached?
• Do you hide bills from your spouse or sneak items into the house?
• Are you unable to say how much you are in debt?
If your answer to several of these questions is yes, you may want to look more closely at your attitude toward money and spending. Compulsive spending can be one of life’s greatest causes of stress.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1988