Dr LeCrone
03-30-2006, 09:24 AM
Last week, I discussed elements of the passive-aggressive personality disorder. Such individuals can be difficult to deal with and can make life miserable for those around them.
For example, a teenager has been asked four times to set the table. When he finally begins the task, he spills a glass of milk and “accidentally” drops a new china plate and smashes it.
A nurse may be all smiles and pleasant to patients while the doctor is in the examining room, but as soon as the doctor leaves, the nurse becomes aloof and disinterested. The patient gets a bad impression of the doctor’s overall treatment team, which causes him to change doctors.
When you encounter people with passive-aggressive personalities, do not put them in areas in which their performance can go unnoticed or where they have the freedom to sabotage part of the operation.
A receptionist who is passive-aggressive can destroy future client contacts because she would be the first contact a future customer would have in a company.
Passive-aggressives are not good members of a team. If their behavior becomes intolerable, they should be fired or encouraged to get help for their problems.
• Adolescents are by definition self-centered and tend to end up in confrontations with authority figures. They also can be passive-aggressive. If your child exhibits some of these characteristics, it may be necessary to spend extra time with him explaining why you want him to do a certain thin and why it fits in with the first of the family’s goals.
Enlisting his support and showing him a lot of love can help him through this turbulent time and may help him overcome passive-aggressive tendencies. Counseling can help if the problem persists.
• If you are married to a person with a passive-aggressive personality or work for one, try not to put yourself in a position of being dependent on them at critical moments. These individuals have a way of causing hurt when you are most vulnerable.
Have your employer put things in writing about your role in the organization. Attempt to get your spouse to verbally communicate dissatisfaction rather than express it indirectly.
• If you are a passive-aggressive, learn to be “up front.” Sit down with a close friend and talk about how you come across with others or to others. The friend should be honest and objective in helping you. Professional counseling also may help.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1987
For example, a teenager has been asked four times to set the table. When he finally begins the task, he spills a glass of milk and “accidentally” drops a new china plate and smashes it.
A nurse may be all smiles and pleasant to patients while the doctor is in the examining room, but as soon as the doctor leaves, the nurse becomes aloof and disinterested. The patient gets a bad impression of the doctor’s overall treatment team, which causes him to change doctors.
When you encounter people with passive-aggressive personalities, do not put them in areas in which their performance can go unnoticed or where they have the freedom to sabotage part of the operation.
A receptionist who is passive-aggressive can destroy future client contacts because she would be the first contact a future customer would have in a company.
Passive-aggressives are not good members of a team. If their behavior becomes intolerable, they should be fired or encouraged to get help for their problems.
• Adolescents are by definition self-centered and tend to end up in confrontations with authority figures. They also can be passive-aggressive. If your child exhibits some of these characteristics, it may be necessary to spend extra time with him explaining why you want him to do a certain thin and why it fits in with the first of the family’s goals.
Enlisting his support and showing him a lot of love can help him through this turbulent time and may help him overcome passive-aggressive tendencies. Counseling can help if the problem persists.
• If you are married to a person with a passive-aggressive personality or work for one, try not to put yourself in a position of being dependent on them at critical moments. These individuals have a way of causing hurt when you are most vulnerable.
Have your employer put things in writing about your role in the organization. Attempt to get your spouse to verbally communicate dissatisfaction rather than express it indirectly.
• If you are a passive-aggressive, learn to be “up front.” Sit down with a close friend and talk about how you come across with others or to others. The friend should be honest and objective in helping you. Professional counseling also may help.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1987