Dr LeCrone
03-24-2006, 02:59 PM
“What a year I have just been through,” Harry confided to his good friend.
“Do you realize all that happened? I bought this house after I got that promotion. I went to the hospital and had my appendix removed. My wife was in the hospital when the baby came, plus two other times. And then Dad died after the car accident. It’s a wonder I survived, but I was determined never to let up.”
Harry did survive, but six months later he suffered the first of several heart attacks. Prolonged stress contributed, Harry was told. Medical scientists have found that too many changes over too short a period of time – whether good or bad, positive or negative – seem to produce incidents of physical ailments. Multiple and rapid changes contribute to sever stress. Some part of each individual’s biological and emotional makeup will eventually cry out. Harry had a heart attack. Someone else could have headaches, stomach problems, circulatory ailments, back pain or emotional problems.
Although most people assume it is only the big tragedies or big life changers that cause the physical or emotional breakdowns, psychologists have found that the smaller difficulties, or daily hassles, are often more damaging. Life changes and daily hassles may be compared to a rock thrown into a pond. It may make a big plunk and splash, but the ripples it sends to shore will wash against the rocks and wear and erode. Poet Charles Bukowski wrote in 1980:
“It is not the large things that send a man to the mad house…no, it is the continuing series of small tragedies that send a man to the mad house. Not the death of his love, but a shoelace that snaps with no time left.”
Daily hassles – annoying and irritating happenings – may come in the form of troublesome neighbors, an uncooperative or unpleasant co-worker, inconsiderate smokers or even a personal habit such as misplacing and losing articles.
To cope with life changes and daily hassles you can:
• Set priorities in your life. Review these priorities frequently to assess where you want to go. You can exert a great deal more control in your life than you think, if you simply stand back and review what is happening.
• Instead of initiating too many changes within a short period of time, try to space out as many as you can. Don’t change jobs several times if a lot of other changes are simultaneously occurring. If you get a divorce, wait for a year or two to sort out your life before remarrying. Don’t assume a large mortgage on a new home during other stressful times.
• If things do begin to pile up and many unavoidable changes do occur, try to set aside some time for psychological regrouping. Take a vacation or short leave of absence from work.
• Talk over potential changes with someone close to you. Your spouses, a parent, a close trusted friend can perhaps look at things more objectively than you are doing. Frequently we are so close to the forest we can’t see the trees in life.
• When numerous changes do occur, stay on a regular sleep schedule, eat properly and get an adequate amount of exercise.
• Realize your limitations. Like Harry, you may survive, but you can adjust and be healthier if you give changes and hassles your prompt attention.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1984
“Do you realize all that happened? I bought this house after I got that promotion. I went to the hospital and had my appendix removed. My wife was in the hospital when the baby came, plus two other times. And then Dad died after the car accident. It’s a wonder I survived, but I was determined never to let up.”
Harry did survive, but six months later he suffered the first of several heart attacks. Prolonged stress contributed, Harry was told. Medical scientists have found that too many changes over too short a period of time – whether good or bad, positive or negative – seem to produce incidents of physical ailments. Multiple and rapid changes contribute to sever stress. Some part of each individual’s biological and emotional makeup will eventually cry out. Harry had a heart attack. Someone else could have headaches, stomach problems, circulatory ailments, back pain or emotional problems.
Although most people assume it is only the big tragedies or big life changers that cause the physical or emotional breakdowns, psychologists have found that the smaller difficulties, or daily hassles, are often more damaging. Life changes and daily hassles may be compared to a rock thrown into a pond. It may make a big plunk and splash, but the ripples it sends to shore will wash against the rocks and wear and erode. Poet Charles Bukowski wrote in 1980:
“It is not the large things that send a man to the mad house…no, it is the continuing series of small tragedies that send a man to the mad house. Not the death of his love, but a shoelace that snaps with no time left.”
Daily hassles – annoying and irritating happenings – may come in the form of troublesome neighbors, an uncooperative or unpleasant co-worker, inconsiderate smokers or even a personal habit such as misplacing and losing articles.
To cope with life changes and daily hassles you can:
• Set priorities in your life. Review these priorities frequently to assess where you want to go. You can exert a great deal more control in your life than you think, if you simply stand back and review what is happening.
• Instead of initiating too many changes within a short period of time, try to space out as many as you can. Don’t change jobs several times if a lot of other changes are simultaneously occurring. If you get a divorce, wait for a year or two to sort out your life before remarrying. Don’t assume a large mortgage on a new home during other stressful times.
• If things do begin to pile up and many unavoidable changes do occur, try to set aside some time for psychological regrouping. Take a vacation or short leave of absence from work.
• Talk over potential changes with someone close to you. Your spouses, a parent, a close trusted friend can perhaps look at things more objectively than you are doing. Frequently we are so close to the forest we can’t see the trees in life.
• When numerous changes do occur, stay on a regular sleep schedule, eat properly and get an adequate amount of exercise.
• Realize your limitations. Like Harry, you may survive, but you can adjust and be healthier if you give changes and hassles your prompt attention.
Harold H. LeCrone, Jr., Ph.D. Copyright 1984